Wise Words for You

Photo by  Scott Broome  on  Unsplash I’ve had only one successful relationship in my life, but it has lasted for over 17 years. It began under the most unlikely and challenging circumstances. And I credit the  Golden Rule  of relationships for overcoming those odds. Our bond strengthens when we follow this rule and weakens when we stray from it. All other acts of love follow when you do this first. We danced around the border of friends and lovers but never crossed the threshold, despite the constant encouragement of our mutual friends. She was moving to Colorado in less than three months. My opportunity to make something happen was vanishing. I had one chance left. It was the night of the Jewish holiday of Rosh Hashanah in September of 2002. I went to my parents’ house in Long Island and would not be back in New York City until night time. “ I’ll be at American Trash ,” she said. “ Come by when you get back .” It was a bar, only a block fro...

Photo by  Andrey Zvyagintsev  on  Unsplash We tend to think of  emotionally mature  and  immature  as concepts that apply to children: Emotionally Mature:   Little Lisa is just so polite and respectful and always waits patiently after asking for something. Emotionally Immature:   Little Johnny throws a fit when he doesn’t get what he wants, something even his younger sister doesn’t do . But here’s the thing: Emotional maturity is not something you  automatically  grow into as you age. You don’t instantly become emotionally mature when you turn 18 and society labels you an adult. Nor do you magically become emotionally mature when you get your first job, get married, have a kid, or retire. Unlike physical maturity, which happens more or less automatically, emotional maturity is largely learned, practiced, and reinforced. And many of us were not taught the skills and habits that foster emotional maturity. Or perhap...

On a busy New York City day, author  David J. Polly  hopped into a cab and asked the driver to drop him off at Grand Central Station. A few minutes later a car jumped out in front of them and if it hadn’t been for the fast reflexes of his driver they would’ve had an accident Just as soon as David regained his composure, he came to the edge of losing it again when the reckless driver had the audacity to begin yelling at David’s taxi driver. David was shocked by this. But what really blew him away was the taxi drivers response when David asked him why he didn’t take the erratic drivers bait and argue back — something David now calls  “ The Law of the Garbage Truck .” “Many people are like garbage trucks. They run around full of garbage, full of frustration, full of anger, and full of disappointment. As their garbage piles up, they look for a place to dump it. And if you let them, they’ll dump it on you. So when someone wants to dump on you, don’t take it per...